Link Fights Random People!
by SmashFan21
Summary: Silly me, I forgot to change the summary. Chapter five is in!
1. Link VS Random People

Link Fights Random People! By SmashFan21  
  
Disclaimer: I own nothing mentioned in this fiction.  
  
Link was sitting around one day, when Wario jumped in.  
  
Wario: ISSSSSSSSSAAAAA MEEE!  
  
Link jumps up, and uses down-A to kill Wario.  
  
Link runs outside of the Smash HQ, and he sees David Letterman.  
  
David: LEEEEEEEEEETSSSSS TTTTALK!!!  
  
Link dashes at David, and rapidly attacks (A repeatedly). David dies.  
  
Link hops in his car, a 2000 Toyota Celia GT-S, and drove away, running over David Copperfield and Aladdin on his way.  
  
Then, Link crashes at the 7 Eleven. James Bond and Obi-Wan Kenobi jump out at him. Link slices Bond, and then shoots Obi-Wan with Bond's gun. He runs into the 7 Eleven and Sonic the Hedgehog bites him. Link cuts off Sonic's head, and kills Crash Bandicoot, and steals bubblegum.  
  
Link: Chewing bubblegum and kicking @$$. And we're ALL out of bubblegum.  
  
Link runs out of the 7 Eleven, and sees the Power Rangers. As his car is busted, he kicks the crap out of Batman and steals the Batmobile. He zooms away, and proceeds to crash into a tree. He runs out of it, but not without cutting off the Pink Rangers' arm and beating the rest of the Power Rangers to death with it. He then runs by Madonna, and cuts her head off. Link runs up, and steals Wonder Woman's jet. He crashes that into the Great Fox. He goes inside and kills the Star Fox team, then jumps out. But he forgot a parachute. Then Jaws from the James Bond movies come out and tries to bite Link, but Link kills him and uses the parachute to land safely into the arms of his girl, Zelda, and receives a kiss. The End. 


	2. Link VS The Matrix

Link Fights Random People!, by SmashFan21  
  
Chapter two: Link VS. The Matrix  
  
Link: Hah, piece of *gets shot*  
  
LINK: 2 LIVES  
  
NEO: 3 LIVES  
  
TRINITY: 3 LIVES  
  
MOUSE: 3 LIVES  
  
AGENT SMITH: 3 LIVES  
  
Link: ARGH! *runs and gets shot again*  
  
LINK: 1 LIFE  
  
Link: Hm, now what? Wait I know.  
  
Link jumps out like an idiot.  
  
Link: THERE IS NO SPOON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Neo looks at a random spoon which was there, and Link took his guns and shot everybody.  
  
LINK: 1 LIFE  
  
EVERYBODY ELSE: 2 LIVES  
  
Link: Shoot, I'm out of ammo! *hides behind some Mario blocks that were there*  
  
All: *stupidly keep shooting at the indestructible Mario blocks until they're out of ammo.  
  
NO GUNS LEFT!!  
  
Trinity: wahhhhhhhmygunsgotnoammoleft!!!!!!!!1111111111111  
  
Link: *stabs them all*  
  
ALL: ONE LIFE LEFT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111111111111111  
  
Link: DIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIED IEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDI EDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIE DIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIED IEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDI EDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIE DIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIED IEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDI EDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIE DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *stabs at random things and the room blows up, but not without Zelda showing up and saving Link*  
  
LINK WINS!  
  
Link: Oh yeah baby!!!!!  
  
ROUND TWO: FIGHT!  
  
Link: Huh? Oh no...  
  
EVERY MATRIX CHARACTER: 99 LIVES  
  
LINK: 1 LIFE  
  
Link: OH NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
*static*  
  
Zelda: Wow Link hunny, that was amazing how you took on all those Matrix characters.  
  
Link: Well, we all know the story. I'm going to sleep now.  
  
*Meanwhile in the castle moat...*  
  
Neo: *with breathing device on* *swimming to Link's room*  
  
To Be CONTINUED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!!!  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own Zelda or The Matrix  
  
Next time: Link & Zelda VS. The Matrix 


	3. Link & Zelda VS The Matrix

Link Fights Random People!, by SmashFan21  
  
CHAPTER THREE: Link & Zelda VS. The Matrix  
  
(A/N: Another title for this chapter could be: The author is a lazy bastard and didn't want to release Plumber Party yet!)  
  
LAST TIME:  
  
Link beat the Matrix.  
  
Matrix survived.  
  
Matrix in castle moat near Link's bedroom.  
  
Now chapter begins.  
  
(God that was such a filler. WHEEEEE!!!!!!!)  
  
Link was in his bedroom, after a long, epic, fight with The Matrix. But little did he know, they survived...  
  
Link: WHAT!!!  
  
Oops, sorry. LOOK OUT!!!  
  
Link: Huh-OW!!!!! YOU SHOT ME!!!  
  
Neo: Hah!  
  
Link: How did you survive?  
  
Neo: Because I am The One.  
  
Link: You know, why does The Matrix capitalize so many things?  
  
Neo: Huh?  
  
Link: You know, like The Matrix, The One. And stuff.  
  
Neo: WHAT???? *explodes*  
  
Link: The Matrix was too much for him.  
  
Voice in the Distance: AIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Link: That sounds like Zelda!!!  
  
Link runs into the throne room, and all the lights were off. Then, the lights turned on to reveal... Morpheous.  
  
Morpheous: Ha, ha, you are so easily fooled.  
  
Link: Where's Zelda!?  
  
*gun cocks*  
  
Zelda: *wielding a shotgun* Right here.  
  
Morpheous: Your guns can be easily dodged. Shoot me.  
  
Zelda shoots like crazy and misses on every shot. Zelda disappears.  
  
Morpheous: Hiding will do you no good. I can dodge whatever you throw at me.  
  
Zelda: *appears behind Morpheous with a knife* DODGE THIS! *stabs, and misses Morpheous completely*  
  
Morpheous: Ha-ha. Now let me show you what The Matrix can do. *concentrates*  
  
Link: What's he doing?  
  
Morpheous: THERE IS NO SPOON! KAMEHAMEHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *shoots a giant beam from his hands*  
  
Link & Zelda: AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! *run away*  
  
Link and Zelda are now in the Royal Kitchen.  
  
Zelda: What do we do? We CANNOT BEAT HIM!  
  
Link: We can't. But I think I know someone who can.  
  
Zelda: You're not thinking...  
  
Link: Oh yeah. Oh yeah, baby. *runs outside into his car*  
  
To Be Continued...  
  
Next time: Link Fights Random People to get to Whoever He's Looking For!  
  
Care to guess who he's looking for? You can guess, you can say who you want it to be, but I've already decided who it is. I gave you a clue in the fic. Until next time!!! :D 


	4. Link Fights Random People Chapter Four!

Link Fights Random People!, by SmashFan21  
  
Chapter Four: Link Fights Random People to find someone!  
  
Last time on Drag-er, LFRP!  
  
Zelda: What do we do? We CANNOT BEAT HIM!  
  
Link: We can't. But I think I know someone who can.  
  
Zelda: You're not thinking...  
  
Link: Oh yeah. Oh yeah, baby. *runs outside into his car*  
  
NOW:  
  
Link is now in his new car, a Saturn Ion, and drives away, running over Cloud Strife. He then is on the road, and bumps into every car from F-Zero, blowing them up. Unfortunately, he runs out of gas, and so, yelling 'YOU DAMN SATURN!', Link kills the Captain Planet team, and takes the Geo Cruiser, and flies through a plot hole, and winds up in the world of...  
  
DRAGON BALL Z!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Link: YAYNESS! I'm here! :D  
  
Then, he bumps into wandering losers.  
  
Loser 1: U s0x0rz! }|  
  
Loser 2: d00d ur riht! }/  
  
Loser 3: LES KIEL HEM!!!!  
  
Losers 1, 2, and 3 attack Link.  
  
Link: Ah, Lamers. My worst enemies.  
  
Can Link beat the Lamers? Who is it Link is looking for? WHO AM I!?!?!?!?!?!?  
  
Find out next time on: DRAGON, err, Link Fights Random People!  
  
Next time: Link VS. The Three Lamerteers! 


	5. Link VS The Three Lamerteers! The Never...

Link Fights Random People!, by SmashFan21  
  
Chapter 5: Link VS. The Three Lamerteers!  
  
Last time on Dragon Ball Link:  
  
Loser 1: U s0x0rz! }|  
  
Loser 2: d00d ur riht! }/  
  
Loser 3: LES KIEL HEM!!!!  
  
Losers 1, 2, and 3 attack Link.  
  
Link: Ah, Lamers. My worst enemies.  
  
Now:  
  
Link: Prepare to die!  
  
Yugi Moto: Prepare to duel!  
  
James: Surrender now or prepare to fight!  
  
Mewoth: That's right!  
  
All: *sweatdrop*  
  
Yugi Moto: Dark Hole!  
  
Losers 1-3, James, and Mewoth are sent to the void.  
  
Link: Good work Yugi! Can you join my quest?  
  
Yugi: Sure! Let me summon the spirit of the puzzle! *YUGIOH!!!*  
  
Yami: Let us continue.  
  
*walk, walk, walk, reaches Hercules(sp?) house!*  
  
Hercules: SUP!?  
  
Link: Wrong address. (fooled you!)  
  
Yami: That wasn't very nice. I actually thought we were going to ask HIM for help.  
  
Link: That's why I'm a Nintendo star and you're a Yu-Gi-Oh! character.  
  
Yami: Oh, ok.  
  
(A/N: I absolutely love Yu-Gi-Oh!. I just like making fun of it more.)  
  
*more walk, walk, walk, gets to another house, yay.*  
  
Goku: Hi!  
  
Link: Hi Goku. Do you know where Future Trunks is? (fooled you again!)  
  
Yami: Wow, you're good.  
  
Goku: *looks baffled* I don't get it.  
  
Link: Never mind. Do you know where Future Trunks is?  
  
Goku: I'll tell you for... a jar of pickles.  
  
Link: WHERE IN THE GOOD GRAVEY ARE WE GOING TO GET A JAR OF PICKLES IN DBZ!?  
  
Yami: I summon: THE HUNGRY BURGER!  
  
Hungry Burger: *hungry burger noise*  
  
Yami: Sniff out some pickles!  
  
Hungry Burger: Bark(?)! *runs off*  
  
Two minutes of chasing later...  
  
Piccalo: WHAT THE HELL IS WITH THIS BURGER!?  
  
Yami: Hungry Burger, I said PICKLES! NOT PICCALO!  
  
Piccalo: You need a jar of pickles? I have some.  
  
Link: Sweet! Can we have them?  
  
Piccalo: If I can have a pair of Majin Buu's socks.  
  
Link: WHY IN THE GREAT GRAVEY WOULD YOU WANT BUU'S SOCKS!?!?!?  
  
Piccalo: They look cool...  
  
Link: *facepalm*  
  
Yami: I don't have a monster for THIS.  
  
Link: Give me that! *takes Yami's deck*  
  
Link: Aha! I summon SEIFER THE SKY DRAGON!  
  
*thunder lightning crash boom*  
  
Seifer: ME WANT BAGELS!!!  
  
Link: Find us a pair of socks! Really smelly ones!  
  
Seifer: *makes a pair of socks appear* BAGELS. IT IS DONE.  
  
Link: Sweet. Hey, wait a sec.  
  
Yami: LOL.  
  
Link: MY F*CKING SOCKS ARE GONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (*^#(%#*^#&#$#  
  
Yami: Uh, you might want to give him those back.  
  
Seifer: I LIKE BAGELS. *returns socks*  
  
Link: ... *slices off Seifer's head*  
  
Yami: Ok, that's an 'oops.'.  
  
Piccalo: *full of blood and bagels* You know, why don't you just go find Buu himself.  
  
Link: SHUT UP! I have a MUCH better idea.  
  
Yami: To go find Buu himself?  
  
Link: Yeah, great idea. Glad I thought of it. Yami, GIVE US WINGS, FOR WE FLY TO GET A FAT MAN'S SOCKS!  
  
Yami: @_@. I summon Winged Guardian of the Fortress #1!  
  
W.G.O.T.F #1: *noise*  
  
Link and Yami climb on, and fly into the day.  
  
Piccalo: I guess I should've told them he lives right across the street from me. _  
  
To be continued in:  
  
Link Fights Random People: The Neverending Side-Quest: Part 1! 


End file.
